Life on the Flipside
Where were we? Ah, yes...one day down...one year to go. Day two in Toba simultaneously incited hope and dispair. I was told to take the morning off because my supervisor figured that I would still be jet-lagged and that I'd want to sleep in a little bit. Ha! Not me...the morning off means taking a mountain biking tour of my area! Equipped with a set of directions from my predecessor, I set out to find Katie's place in Ise. I should probably mention that:
a) I had directions to Katie's apartment BUILDING...but not the actual apartment number...and I had no way of contacting her
b) Japanese directions are quite...omnious. Since there are no street names, Japanese directions take the following format:
"You’ll pass thru a little town and after that u’ll see a sign pointing right. I think it says kazuki or something like that but I could be well off. There is no light at this sign. U’ll know it’s the right turn off cus there’ll be a big wide open space of rice paddies in front of u on ur right, a hedge or something along the road on ur left and u’ll see the highway to your right and maybe jusco in front of u in the distance."
I got lost. It might be because I can't read signs in Japanese, or it might be because I was completely absorbed in the lucious scenery. Either way, I'm biking through the mountains, taking it on faith that I might stumble across one of the landmarks from the directions. I tried to ask for directions, but I don't speak Japanese...and people here don't speak English. It's a good thing have an affinity for wandering around aimlessly. After two hours of riding, I finally stumbled across one of the landmarks mentioned in the directions and FOUND Katie's apartment complex. A small miracle. Now to find her actual apartment...come on logic don't fail me now. I stood at the back of the apartment and looked at all of the balconies. If it had plants on it, laundry hanging on a rack, or any other sign of prolonged inhabitance, it wasn't Katie's. This lowered it down to four apartments. Time for my first game of nicky-nicky-nine-doors in Japan. Sweet. After knocking on all of the candidate doors without receiving an answer I checked my watch to discover that I only had an hour and a half to get home, shower and take the 20 minute walk to school to meet my supervisor. Another miracle was in order, but this time I knew the way and thus wasn't aimlessly wandering. I booked it home as fast as I could...but I did get lost again. Upon finding my place I hopped into the world's coldest shower and made a valiant attempt to make myself presentable for my meeting with my supervisor. I had been out of the shower for about 10 minutes when I realized that I was still sweating, HEAVILY. Not good. I grabbed an extra shirt and threw a golf shirt into my bag and quickly walked to school.
When I arrived at school I had completely sweated through my first shirt. Attractive. Additionally, I was POURING sweat. My hair looked like I had just walked out of the shower without drying it. I walked into the teacher's lounge and everyone stares. Nice...way to make a great second impression Chris. My supervisor takes one look at me and says, "Janca-san, why are you always sweating?" I hear snickers from the other teachers. I try to explain that I went for a bike ride and then came to school very quickly, but she looks at me as though I'm some sort of mutant...my superpower is profuse sweating leading to severe dehydration.
My supervisor (Kae) and I leave the school to run a few errands around town. As she grabbed her car, I switched into my fresh shirt. Five minutes later it was soaked. Mmmmmm. Our first stop was Toba city hall to get me registered as an alien. Ha! I feel like one, why not register as one?! When we arrived at city hall, Kae walked me through the registry form. I tried my best to follow her directions, but at this point the stifling heat and dehydration were beginning to take a toll on me. I was spacing out when Kae informed me that we had to go to a photo shop down the street to have my picture taken for the application. We cruised down to the photo shop and I'm still pouring sweat. At the photo shop a nice young woman took the worst picture of me that I've ever seen. Half smile, hair soaked, sweat covered face. Hot. While she was printing the photos the heat finally got the best of me. My stomach turned sharply, stars flashed in front of my eyes and I needed to have a seat. Kae quickly got me a water and I sat for a while in the photo shop doing my best not to vomit. Japan: 1 Chris: 0. When I felt well enough, we proceeded back to city hall and finished the application. I still wasn't doing well when we hit the bank, so Kae took me home immediately after we left. Did I mention that my welcome party was scheduled for that night? Well it was. Greeeeat. I stumbled into my apartment on the pretense that I would call Kae if I couldn't make it to the welcome party. As I was guzzling water to rehydrate, my phone started ringing. Weird...who knows my phone number?? It was Katie, she got my number from a JET who knew my predecessor and therefore had his number. She informed me that there was a party for Ise-shima JETs on Friday and a beach party on Saturday. So it was settled. If I wanted to go out on the weekend I would HAVE to make it to my welcome party. Otherwise it would be rescheduled for either Friday or Saturday and I would have to miss one of the parties. I got off the phone with Katie, hopped into bed for a bit of a sleep and vowed that if I made it through the night, I would take it easy in the coming days and be more attentive to the fact that I can't live like I did in North America.
Upon waking I felt MUCH better. Maybe not "eating large quantities of raw fish" better...but better nonetheless. Kae picked me up and we headed out with the other English teachers for a night on the town. Our first stop was a sushi restaurant. By the time we had been seated (on the floor...for those of you who were wondering) my stomach felt much better and I was ready to sushi. They ordered LOADS of food and kept on making me eat strange things. "Janca-san, try this. Do you like it".....(chewing)....(chewing)..."Yep, that's pretty good." After a while, I think they got the point. I'll eat anything. I have a universal stomach. I'll come to your home country and eat the domestic foods that YOU won't even eat. Brains, raw stuff, strange stuff, organs...bring it on. They seemed to like my consumption ethic.
After the sushi place, we went to another restaurant for Japanese pizza. This stuff is great. You order one, two or three meats (in our case, Okuyama sensei ordered squid and pork) and then a few minutes later they bring you a bowl that's filled with cabbage, water, egg and flour and topped with your meat choice. You're sitting on the floor in front of a table with a grill on it. You take the meat off the top and toss it on the grill. Next, you thoroughly stir the cabbage, egg, flour and water and pour about half of the mix onto the grill in a pancake shape. After the mix is cooked enough that it will hold together when flipped, you top the patty with your meats, pour the rest of the batter on top of the meats and then flip the whole thing to cook the other side. After both sides are thoroughly cooked you have a patty that is about two inches thick. You top it with pizza sauce (barbecue sauce), fish flakes and mayonaise. It might not sound great...but it is!! After we finished our pizzas, I felt as though I had connected a little bit more with the teachers. They're all really great and really patient people. It made me feel more at ease with my new living situation. We left the pizza place and headed to our respective homes. I was facing six consecutive days off...time to live it up!
Day Three:
As previously mentioned, I had a JET party on Friday night. I spent most of the day sleeping, as per my promise to take it easy. After sleeping I spent most of the day bumming around my apartment indulging utter randomness. At about 5:30 I headed towards the local train station which I had scouted out earlier in the day. It was well hidden. I found it by following train tracks. I'm a genius in disguise...in case you were unaware. My first attempt at buying a train ticket was...interesting. In Japan you buy train tickets from...well basically a vending machine. I hadn't a clue where to begin, so I asked the train attendant. Of course, he had only a slight clue what I was talking about because I speak English and he spoke Japanese. Nevertheless, by stressing the name of the station that I wanted to end up at, he pointed to the buttons that I needed to press and after a few beeps and clanks I had bought my first train ticket. Awesome. After an absolutely beautiful 25 minute ride I arrived at Ujiyamada station where I was to meet Katie and her new friend Pamela. However, before I met up with the girls I bumped into a group of three white guys...gaijin (foreigners). In Japan, you can spot a gaijin from a mile away. You see, Japan is 99% Japanese, so it's rare to see someone who doesn't look Asian. I walk up to the guys and ask if they're there for the JET party. Of course they are...what else would three white guys be doing hanging out at Ujiyamada station?? We introduce ourselves, chit-chat for a bit and then hop into a car in order to find the other JETs who we are supposed to be meeting up with. After a short time we find them and get sketchy directions to a restaurant in the area. After turning around about 15 times we run into the people who gave us the directions...they're lost too. Ha! They call someone who knows where the restaurant is and we're back in business. We get to the restaurant and everyone slowly trickles in. After introductions and a few drinks everyone begins to gel. It's only been one day since I had a full fledged English conversation...but let me tell you, it was GREAT! You don't realise how vital communication is until you lose conversational ability...perhaps that's why telecom is such big business. After we finish our drinks and random seafood apatizers we decide to head to a kareoke bar. I went via cab with a few fellow JETs, so we arrived quite a bit earlier than the folks who were biking. In our spare time we hit up a beer vending machine and purchased the biggest cans of beer that I've ever seen! Check out these pics:
We promptly headed back to the kareoke club with beers in hand. The club looked like a car rental shop. The people were even wearing uniforms that said car rental...maybe they did in fact rent cars and provide kareoke services. I have no idea...but it seemed right at the time. As we approached the door I'm thinking, “what do I do with my beer?” We're going into a bar, right? You can't possibly bring your own booze into a bar!?!? Wrong. It's pretty much self serve. You and your friends walk in with your own booze, food, etc, get a room and each toss in about 400 yen ($4.00) to sit around and sing kareoke. Craziness.
That night I crashed at Katie's place in Ise because we were heading to the beach in the morning and the girl who lives above her was our ride. Plus, I wanted to see what her apartment was like and to witness for myself the cockroach infestation that was making her apartment uninhabitable. It didn't seem so bad that night...but I would soon find out just how bad the infestation was.
Day Four:
The next morning we head for the beach at about 10:00 am. It was about a 45 minute drive through a national park. It was, once again, gorgeous. After getting lost....AGAIN, we arrived in a place called Chuo (“Ko”) and began searching for the other JETs. We have to walk to the other end of the beach to find them, but after we do it's a lazy day at the beach consisting of lounging and mingling. Here's a few pics:
This is a dead sea turtle...I was supposed to be riding it...but it was rotten, so I couldn't get too close.
After the beach, Katie's friend Pamela decides that we should all go out for an onsen (public bath/hot tub) and then dinner. I think everyone was a bit iffy about the onsen because a) we were all tired, hungry and sunburned and b) we had all met mere hours ago...and now we were going to be naked in a tub together (note: there are separate rooms for males and females). After a while of convincing Pam got us to the onsen...and I think we were all glad that she did. The group consisted of Katie, Pam, Christine, Marsha, Nobiko, Taylor and I. As you can tell, there are only two guys...akward...but then again, I've never been shy about being naked. We head to our respective rooms, rinse off and jump into the onsen. Taylor and I decide to use the outdoor onsen. It was great, you're basically sitting naked in a hot tub just off the beach, on a third floor balcony watching the tide come in. Completely and utterly relaxing.
After about 45 minutes in the onsen we all met in the lobby and headed to dinner quite refreshed. I convinced the group to head back to the okonomiage (Japanese pizza) place that my co-workers had taken me for my work party. Good times. After dinner we headed back to Ise to hang out for a while longer. Here's where I found out how bad the cockroach infestation was.
After everyone had called it a night, Katie and I were standing in her living room...she looks at me horrified and points to the wall and says, “What's that?!?!” I turn around...COCKROACH...it's big...probably a couple on inches in length. Katie runs into the washroom and says to me, “tell me when it's over.” Now, I've always been a sort of pacifist...I don't really like to kill anything, but obviously this roach had to go. I rolled up a newspaper...thought to myself, “I hope that aliens don't look at me like I'm a pest and swat me to death.” I know, kind of random. I look at the thing really close...it stays deathly still as I eye it. It knows what's coming. I think, “just hit it quick and hard...make it painless” and then I swing. I hit it...but it's only stunned. It scurries away into Katie's closet, I think “she is gonna FREAK out if I don't find this thing.” So I begin hunting it. All feelings of sympathy have vanished. IT'S ON NOW!! I hear scuffling and it runs out of the closet...I lean in an smack it again. STILL the thing is moving. I've broken some of it's legs on one side of it's body...but it's still moving at a pretty good pace. I quickly overtake it, wind up, and wail it. This time it splatters all over the wall. Mission accomplished. I clean it up and let Katie out of the washroom. I realize that I definately need to take action if she's going to live comfortably in this apartment.
The next day Katie and Pam head to work and I begin preparing for war. Rule number one of war: know your enemy. Cockroaches have existed, unchanged for about 150 million years. Why? Because they can lay up to a million eggs in a year and THEY NEVER DIE. Cockroaches are capable of living for a month without food and remaining alive headless for up to a week. A cockroach can also hold its breath for 45 minutes and has the ability to slow down its heart rate. It's speculated that these things will survive nuclear war, should it ever happen. I guess that removes nuclear warfare from my list of termination strategies.
Cockroach Weaknesses:
1)Cockroaches can't go more than a day without water
2)Cockroaches can be squished by hard, blunt objects
3)The natural enemy of the cockroach just happens to be...Christopher Janca: Cockroach Commando.
I spent the better part of the day containing all sources of water, sealing any open cracks, and pulverizing any of the unfortunate roaches that crossed my path. By the end of the day I had become so hardened by war that I was crushing roaches between my fingers when I saw them. The day was mine...but the war is still raging on...the roaches refuse to vacate...but the Cockroach-apocalypse is near...Katie's school has ordered a company to come in and fumegate...but it's summer vacation...so it's going to take a while. Have a look at a spider that I found it Katie's apartment...it took me a few blows to kill it...because it was big enough to have bones...BONES!
Day Five:
I decided to climb a moutain on day five. I had no real strategy. My place is surrounded by mountains, so I just started walking towards one and hoped for the best. I basically ended up wandering around in the woods for about 20 minutes...and then I stumbled upon a trail! Success! After another 20 minutes the trail disappeared. Back to picking my way through thick bushes. Not so much fun...especially when you walk through a spider web find the spider on your FACE. You can't freak out either...if you do, you'll lose your footing and fall down a steep slope for a while. After about 2 hours of slowly winding my way up the side of the mountain, I reached the top...just gorgeous. There was a shrine of some sort at the top. I'm not sure if it was Shinto or Buddhist, but it was very interesting to find at the top of a mountain! I wish that all of you could have seen it with me. I'll let the pictures speak for themselves.
The following few days were spent hanging out here and there. I spent a couple of days in the capital of Mie prefecture for an orientation and I've spent a few days at the school preparing for my self introduction and lessons for the first week. Katie and I went hiking on a mountain near her place two days ago. It was a blast! We didn't reach the top because we weren't really on a trail...but I think we're gonna give it another try soon.
Yesterday I went to school during the day and then went for a bike ride after school. On the ride I hit up the 100 yen store and the grocery store. Before continuing, I have to say that I LOVE 100 yen stores. I got a belt, bike light, reflector, batteries, laundry detergent, an airfreshener, incense, some food and some other random stuff for 1,300 yen...that's about $13 Canadian. INSANE!
I haven't really grocery shopped since I got here. The Japanese way is to buy a few things here and there when you need them, but I needed SOME food in my fridge so that I could cook dinner and make my lunch for school. In Japan you walk into the store and grab a basket, which you place on a small cart-like thing, that makes your basket into a shopping cart...but it's pretty much a basket on wheels. Let me preface this story by mentioning that I am clearly a foreigner in my town. Everyone stares at me when I walk down the street. Yesterday a midget stared at me...I guess I know how he feels now...no more midget jokes. So yeah, I cruise into the store and everyone is naturally looking at me...but I biked there..so I'm wearing a helmet...and I'm dripping sweat...and I'm a crazy foreigner. It was actually quite funny, because I forgot that I was wearing the helmet, until I bent over to pick up some vegetables and I smoked my head off of a metal pole. The helmet saved me from injury...but it made a loud noise...everyone around me turned to see what had happened... “OH, that's why the crazy foreigner is wearing a helmet...he's an idiot.” I had to hold back laughter...they looked at me as though I was the most absurd thing they had ever seen. THEN, I packed my basket FULL...food was practically falling out of the basket it was so full. At the checkout there's quite a few people waiting to check out. As I roll up, they slowly fall silent and stare...I imagine that they were thinking something along the lines of, “What the hell is this guy doing?!? Is the apocalypse coming? Who wears a helmet to the grocery store and stockpiles food??” I turn slowly to all of them and grin widely. So I'm a freak...sweet.
Today I got the grand tour at school. Up until this point I had simply walked in and gone directly to the staff room. My supervisor, Kae, showed me where I would be teaching, the school gym, the school club rooms, etc. On the tour we end up walking by a building where a few students are fencing. I look hesitantly inside as the two fencers attack one another. As Kae and I watch, a student spots us and invites us inside to watch the match. Upon entering the building, I can see who the fencers are. One is a student that I have never seen before, the other is the fencing instructor that I met on day one...he smiles when I walk in...greeeeaaaat. After the match finishes, he hands me one of the swords (whatever they're called in fencing) and shows me how to hold it. I smile, try my best to follow along and then hand it back to him. They say a few things in Japanese, I smile and then Kae and I excuse ourselves and leave the building. As we walk I say to her, “that looked very interesting, would they allow me to come by and try it out sometime?” She responds, “Oh yes, they very much like it when people come to fence with them. It costs alot of money for the equipment, so not many students want to fence...A few years ago the fencing team was very strong. Our best student was ranked number six in Japan Highschool Tournament. Do you say that?” “Yes, highschool tournament makes sense.” “Ok, yes. But then, the professional teacher was transferred to a different school and I was put in charge of the fencing club. They were not so happy because I don't know about fencing. But he..” she points to the fencing instructor “...is a professional fencer, so the students are happy.” Then she adds as a sidebar...completely devoid of emotion or expression, “But be careful if you do go, it can be dangerous. I brought a team to the highschool tournament and my student's vest was pierced and he died.” WHAT?!? HE DIED?!? She says THAT and then just keeps walking. So yeah, I'm not going ANYWHERE near the fencing club. Maybe I'll stick to English.
a) I had directions to Katie's apartment BUILDING...but not the actual apartment number...and I had no way of contacting her
b) Japanese directions are quite...omnious. Since there are no street names, Japanese directions take the following format:
"You’ll pass thru a little town and after that u’ll see a sign pointing right. I think it says kazuki or something like that but I could be well off. There is no light at this sign. U’ll know it’s the right turn off cus there’ll be a big wide open space of rice paddies in front of u on ur right, a hedge or something along the road on ur left and u’ll see the highway to your right and maybe jusco in front of u in the distance."
I got lost. It might be because I can't read signs in Japanese, or it might be because I was completely absorbed in the lucious scenery. Either way, I'm biking through the mountains, taking it on faith that I might stumble across one of the landmarks from the directions. I tried to ask for directions, but I don't speak Japanese...and people here don't speak English. It's a good thing have an affinity for wandering around aimlessly. After two hours of riding, I finally stumbled across one of the landmarks mentioned in the directions and FOUND Katie's apartment complex. A small miracle. Now to find her actual apartment...come on logic don't fail me now. I stood at the back of the apartment and looked at all of the balconies. If it had plants on it, laundry hanging on a rack, or any other sign of prolonged inhabitance, it wasn't Katie's. This lowered it down to four apartments. Time for my first game of nicky-nicky-nine-doors in Japan. Sweet. After knocking on all of the candidate doors without receiving an answer I checked my watch to discover that I only had an hour and a half to get home, shower and take the 20 minute walk to school to meet my supervisor. Another miracle was in order, but this time I knew the way and thus wasn't aimlessly wandering. I booked it home as fast as I could...but I did get lost again. Upon finding my place I hopped into the world's coldest shower and made a valiant attempt to make myself presentable for my meeting with my supervisor. I had been out of the shower for about 10 minutes when I realized that I was still sweating, HEAVILY. Not good. I grabbed an extra shirt and threw a golf shirt into my bag and quickly walked to school.
When I arrived at school I had completely sweated through my first shirt. Attractive. Additionally, I was POURING sweat. My hair looked like I had just walked out of the shower without drying it. I walked into the teacher's lounge and everyone stares. Nice...way to make a great second impression Chris. My supervisor takes one look at me and says, "Janca-san, why are you always sweating?" I hear snickers from the other teachers. I try to explain that I went for a bike ride and then came to school very quickly, but she looks at me as though I'm some sort of mutant...my superpower is profuse sweating leading to severe dehydration.
My supervisor (Kae) and I leave the school to run a few errands around town. As she grabbed her car, I switched into my fresh shirt. Five minutes later it was soaked. Mmmmmm. Our first stop was Toba city hall to get me registered as an alien. Ha! I feel like one, why not register as one?! When we arrived at city hall, Kae walked me through the registry form. I tried my best to follow her directions, but at this point the stifling heat and dehydration were beginning to take a toll on me. I was spacing out when Kae informed me that we had to go to a photo shop down the street to have my picture taken for the application. We cruised down to the photo shop and I'm still pouring sweat. At the photo shop a nice young woman took the worst picture of me that I've ever seen. Half smile, hair soaked, sweat covered face. Hot. While she was printing the photos the heat finally got the best of me. My stomach turned sharply, stars flashed in front of my eyes and I needed to have a seat. Kae quickly got me a water and I sat for a while in the photo shop doing my best not to vomit. Japan: 1 Chris: 0. When I felt well enough, we proceeded back to city hall and finished the application. I still wasn't doing well when we hit the bank, so Kae took me home immediately after we left. Did I mention that my welcome party was scheduled for that night? Well it was. Greeeeat. I stumbled into my apartment on the pretense that I would call Kae if I couldn't make it to the welcome party. As I was guzzling water to rehydrate, my phone started ringing. Weird...who knows my phone number?? It was Katie, she got my number from a JET who knew my predecessor and therefore had his number. She informed me that there was a party for Ise-shima JETs on Friday and a beach party on Saturday. So it was settled. If I wanted to go out on the weekend I would HAVE to make it to my welcome party. Otherwise it would be rescheduled for either Friday or Saturday and I would have to miss one of the parties. I got off the phone with Katie, hopped into bed for a bit of a sleep and vowed that if I made it through the night, I would take it easy in the coming days and be more attentive to the fact that I can't live like I did in North America.
Upon waking I felt MUCH better. Maybe not "eating large quantities of raw fish" better...but better nonetheless. Kae picked me up and we headed out with the other English teachers for a night on the town. Our first stop was a sushi restaurant. By the time we had been seated (on the floor...for those of you who were wondering) my stomach felt much better and I was ready to sushi. They ordered LOADS of food and kept on making me eat strange things. "Janca-san, try this. Do you like it".....(chewing)....(chewing)..."Yep, that's pretty good." After a while, I think they got the point. I'll eat anything. I have a universal stomach. I'll come to your home country and eat the domestic foods that YOU won't even eat. Brains, raw stuff, strange stuff, organs...bring it on. They seemed to like my consumption ethic.
After the sushi place, we went to another restaurant for Japanese pizza. This stuff is great. You order one, two or three meats (in our case, Okuyama sensei ordered squid and pork) and then a few minutes later they bring you a bowl that's filled with cabbage, water, egg and flour and topped with your meat choice. You're sitting on the floor in front of a table with a grill on it. You take the meat off the top and toss it on the grill. Next, you thoroughly stir the cabbage, egg, flour and water and pour about half of the mix onto the grill in a pancake shape. After the mix is cooked enough that it will hold together when flipped, you top the patty with your meats, pour the rest of the batter on top of the meats and then flip the whole thing to cook the other side. After both sides are thoroughly cooked you have a patty that is about two inches thick. You top it with pizza sauce (barbecue sauce), fish flakes and mayonaise. It might not sound great...but it is!! After we finished our pizzas, I felt as though I had connected a little bit more with the teachers. They're all really great and really patient people. It made me feel more at ease with my new living situation. We left the pizza place and headed to our respective homes. I was facing six consecutive days off...time to live it up!
Day Three:
As previously mentioned, I had a JET party on Friday night. I spent most of the day sleeping, as per my promise to take it easy. After sleeping I spent most of the day bumming around my apartment indulging utter randomness. At about 5:30 I headed towards the local train station which I had scouted out earlier in the day. It was well hidden. I found it by following train tracks. I'm a genius in disguise...in case you were unaware. My first attempt at buying a train ticket was...interesting. In Japan you buy train tickets from...well basically a vending machine. I hadn't a clue where to begin, so I asked the train attendant. Of course, he had only a slight clue what I was talking about because I speak English and he spoke Japanese. Nevertheless, by stressing the name of the station that I wanted to end up at, he pointed to the buttons that I needed to press and after a few beeps and clanks I had bought my first train ticket. Awesome. After an absolutely beautiful 25 minute ride I arrived at Ujiyamada station where I was to meet Katie and her new friend Pamela. However, before I met up with the girls I bumped into a group of three white guys...gaijin (foreigners). In Japan, you can spot a gaijin from a mile away. You see, Japan is 99% Japanese, so it's rare to see someone who doesn't look Asian. I walk up to the guys and ask if they're there for the JET party. Of course they are...what else would three white guys be doing hanging out at Ujiyamada station?? We introduce ourselves, chit-chat for a bit and then hop into a car in order to find the other JETs who we are supposed to be meeting up with. After a short time we find them and get sketchy directions to a restaurant in the area. After turning around about 15 times we run into the people who gave us the directions...they're lost too. Ha! They call someone who knows where the restaurant is and we're back in business. We get to the restaurant and everyone slowly trickles in. After introductions and a few drinks everyone begins to gel. It's only been one day since I had a full fledged English conversation...but let me tell you, it was GREAT! You don't realise how vital communication is until you lose conversational ability...perhaps that's why telecom is such big business. After we finish our drinks and random seafood apatizers we decide to head to a kareoke bar. I went via cab with a few fellow JETs, so we arrived quite a bit earlier than the folks who were biking. In our spare time we hit up a beer vending machine and purchased the biggest cans of beer that I've ever seen! Check out these pics:
We promptly headed back to the kareoke club with beers in hand. The club looked like a car rental shop. The people were even wearing uniforms that said car rental...maybe they did in fact rent cars and provide kareoke services. I have no idea...but it seemed right at the time. As we approached the door I'm thinking, “what do I do with my beer?” We're going into a bar, right? You can't possibly bring your own booze into a bar!?!? Wrong. It's pretty much self serve. You and your friends walk in with your own booze, food, etc, get a room and each toss in about 400 yen ($4.00) to sit around and sing kareoke. Craziness.
That night I crashed at Katie's place in Ise because we were heading to the beach in the morning and the girl who lives above her was our ride. Plus, I wanted to see what her apartment was like and to witness for myself the cockroach infestation that was making her apartment uninhabitable. It didn't seem so bad that night...but I would soon find out just how bad the infestation was.
Day Four:
The next morning we head for the beach at about 10:00 am. It was about a 45 minute drive through a national park. It was, once again, gorgeous. After getting lost....AGAIN, we arrived in a place called Chuo (“Ko”) and began searching for the other JETs. We have to walk to the other end of the beach to find them, but after we do it's a lazy day at the beach consisting of lounging and mingling. Here's a few pics:
This is a dead sea turtle...I was supposed to be riding it...but it was rotten, so I couldn't get too close.
After the beach, Katie's friend Pamela decides that we should all go out for an onsen (public bath/hot tub) and then dinner. I think everyone was a bit iffy about the onsen because a) we were all tired, hungry and sunburned and b) we had all met mere hours ago...and now we were going to be naked in a tub together (note: there are separate rooms for males and females). After a while of convincing Pam got us to the onsen...and I think we were all glad that she did. The group consisted of Katie, Pam, Christine, Marsha, Nobiko, Taylor and I. As you can tell, there are only two guys...akward...but then again, I've never been shy about being naked. We head to our respective rooms, rinse off and jump into the onsen. Taylor and I decide to use the outdoor onsen. It was great, you're basically sitting naked in a hot tub just off the beach, on a third floor balcony watching the tide come in. Completely and utterly relaxing.
After about 45 minutes in the onsen we all met in the lobby and headed to dinner quite refreshed. I convinced the group to head back to the okonomiage (Japanese pizza) place that my co-workers had taken me for my work party. Good times. After dinner we headed back to Ise to hang out for a while longer. Here's where I found out how bad the cockroach infestation was.
After everyone had called it a night, Katie and I were standing in her living room...she looks at me horrified and points to the wall and says, “What's that?!?!” I turn around...COCKROACH...it's big...probably a couple on inches in length. Katie runs into the washroom and says to me, “tell me when it's over.” Now, I've always been a sort of pacifist...I don't really like to kill anything, but obviously this roach had to go. I rolled up a newspaper...thought to myself, “I hope that aliens don't look at me like I'm a pest and swat me to death.” I know, kind of random. I look at the thing really close...it stays deathly still as I eye it. It knows what's coming. I think, “just hit it quick and hard...make it painless” and then I swing. I hit it...but it's only stunned. It scurries away into Katie's closet, I think “she is gonna FREAK out if I don't find this thing.” So I begin hunting it. All feelings of sympathy have vanished. IT'S ON NOW!! I hear scuffling and it runs out of the closet...I lean in an smack it again. STILL the thing is moving. I've broken some of it's legs on one side of it's body...but it's still moving at a pretty good pace. I quickly overtake it, wind up, and wail it. This time it splatters all over the wall. Mission accomplished. I clean it up and let Katie out of the washroom. I realize that I definately need to take action if she's going to live comfortably in this apartment.
The next day Katie and Pam head to work and I begin preparing for war. Rule number one of war: know your enemy. Cockroaches have existed, unchanged for about 150 million years. Why? Because they can lay up to a million eggs in a year and THEY NEVER DIE. Cockroaches are capable of living for a month without food and remaining alive headless for up to a week. A cockroach can also hold its breath for 45 minutes and has the ability to slow down its heart rate. It's speculated that these things will survive nuclear war, should it ever happen. I guess that removes nuclear warfare from my list of termination strategies.
Cockroach Weaknesses:
1)Cockroaches can't go more than a day without water
2)Cockroaches can be squished by hard, blunt objects
3)The natural enemy of the cockroach just happens to be...Christopher Janca: Cockroach Commando.
I spent the better part of the day containing all sources of water, sealing any open cracks, and pulverizing any of the unfortunate roaches that crossed my path. By the end of the day I had become so hardened by war that I was crushing roaches between my fingers when I saw them. The day was mine...but the war is still raging on...the roaches refuse to vacate...but the Cockroach-apocalypse is near...Katie's school has ordered a company to come in and fumegate...but it's summer vacation...so it's going to take a while. Have a look at a spider that I found it Katie's apartment...it took me a few blows to kill it...because it was big enough to have bones...BONES!
Day Five:
I decided to climb a moutain on day five. I had no real strategy. My place is surrounded by mountains, so I just started walking towards one and hoped for the best. I basically ended up wandering around in the woods for about 20 minutes...and then I stumbled upon a trail! Success! After another 20 minutes the trail disappeared. Back to picking my way through thick bushes. Not so much fun...especially when you walk through a spider web find the spider on your FACE. You can't freak out either...if you do, you'll lose your footing and fall down a steep slope for a while. After about 2 hours of slowly winding my way up the side of the mountain, I reached the top...just gorgeous. There was a shrine of some sort at the top. I'm not sure if it was Shinto or Buddhist, but it was very interesting to find at the top of a mountain! I wish that all of you could have seen it with me. I'll let the pictures speak for themselves.
The following few days were spent hanging out here and there. I spent a couple of days in the capital of Mie prefecture for an orientation and I've spent a few days at the school preparing for my self introduction and lessons for the first week. Katie and I went hiking on a mountain near her place two days ago. It was a blast! We didn't reach the top because we weren't really on a trail...but I think we're gonna give it another try soon.
Yesterday I went to school during the day and then went for a bike ride after school. On the ride I hit up the 100 yen store and the grocery store. Before continuing, I have to say that I LOVE 100 yen stores. I got a belt, bike light, reflector, batteries, laundry detergent, an airfreshener, incense, some food and some other random stuff for 1,300 yen...that's about $13 Canadian. INSANE!
I haven't really grocery shopped since I got here. The Japanese way is to buy a few things here and there when you need them, but I needed SOME food in my fridge so that I could cook dinner and make my lunch for school. In Japan you walk into the store and grab a basket, which you place on a small cart-like thing, that makes your basket into a shopping cart...but it's pretty much a basket on wheels. Let me preface this story by mentioning that I am clearly a foreigner in my town. Everyone stares at me when I walk down the street. Yesterday a midget stared at me...I guess I know how he feels now...no more midget jokes. So yeah, I cruise into the store and everyone is naturally looking at me...but I biked there..so I'm wearing a helmet...and I'm dripping sweat...and I'm a crazy foreigner. It was actually quite funny, because I forgot that I was wearing the helmet, until I bent over to pick up some vegetables and I smoked my head off of a metal pole. The helmet saved me from injury...but it made a loud noise...everyone around me turned to see what had happened... “OH, that's why the crazy foreigner is wearing a helmet...he's an idiot.” I had to hold back laughter...they looked at me as though I was the most absurd thing they had ever seen. THEN, I packed my basket FULL...food was practically falling out of the basket it was so full. At the checkout there's quite a few people waiting to check out. As I roll up, they slowly fall silent and stare...I imagine that they were thinking something along the lines of, “What the hell is this guy doing?!? Is the apocalypse coming? Who wears a helmet to the grocery store and stockpiles food??” I turn slowly to all of them and grin widely. So I'm a freak...sweet.
Today I got the grand tour at school. Up until this point I had simply walked in and gone directly to the staff room. My supervisor, Kae, showed me where I would be teaching, the school gym, the school club rooms, etc. On the tour we end up walking by a building where a few students are fencing. I look hesitantly inside as the two fencers attack one another. As Kae and I watch, a student spots us and invites us inside to watch the match. Upon entering the building, I can see who the fencers are. One is a student that I have never seen before, the other is the fencing instructor that I met on day one...he smiles when I walk in...greeeeaaaat. After the match finishes, he hands me one of the swords (whatever they're called in fencing) and shows me how to hold it. I smile, try my best to follow along and then hand it back to him. They say a few things in Japanese, I smile and then Kae and I excuse ourselves and leave the building. As we walk I say to her, “that looked very interesting, would they allow me to come by and try it out sometime?” She responds, “Oh yes, they very much like it when people come to fence with them. It costs alot of money for the equipment, so not many students want to fence...A few years ago the fencing team was very strong. Our best student was ranked number six in Japan Highschool Tournament. Do you say that?” “Yes, highschool tournament makes sense.” “Ok, yes. But then, the professional teacher was transferred to a different school and I was put in charge of the fencing club. They were not so happy because I don't know about fencing. But he..” she points to the fencing instructor “...is a professional fencer, so the students are happy.” Then she adds as a sidebar...completely devoid of emotion or expression, “But be careful if you do go, it can be dangerous. I brought a team to the highschool tournament and my student's vest was pierced and he died.” WHAT?!? HE DIED?!? She says THAT and then just keeps walking. So yeah, I'm not going ANYWHERE near the fencing club. Maybe I'll stick to English.
posted by Christopher Janca at 2:20 a.m.
2 Comments:
Dude, that was too funny! Melissa woke me up because she was laughing so loudly!
Hey, if you learn to fence, you'll have a new weapon in your commando missions against the cockroaches!
Just, you know...don't die.
God bless
Gregory
Hey Janca-son, - great blog.
You've got the right idea on how to handle cockroaches. Mom and I had a similiar experience when we moved into Jane & Finch when we were first married. While they were much smaller, they were still "hardy", and I was killing 2-3 dozen a day. Open the sugar bowl, and you'd find one or two swimming there. I remember one day when Mom freaked because as she pulled a sweater out of her dresser drawer for work, a couple fell out onto her! You need one of these enhanced electrical fly swatters that I have... ;-)
As per offending the locals, I wouldn't doubt that riding a rotting dead sea turtle might raise a few eyebrows there. Would you jump on a dead deer lying on the side of the road back home? And what would the local hunter be thinking as he passed you? I know what I'd be thinking ;-)
Seems that you've had your share of exposure to local critters! That was a fair sized spider. Are any of them dangerous? I see that the vacuum hose was out in the picture - is that you method of extermination? Works for me!
Take care - and keep bloggin'. Glad everything is working out for you.
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